Desert Colossus - Raz 'n Squish (IT IS FINISHED)

Guzol watched Sayomi with amusement.

"Well have I ever, the girl's learned to kill skeletons!" He clapped his hands, grinning. In the meantime, the last stalfos had tried to creep up on him, but slipped on a loose piece of rock and tumbled down. Guzol pulled out his spear again and slammed it through the unlucky stalfos' head.

Which didn't kill it immediately. Instead the stalfos got up again, spear still in its head. It whipped its head around violently, Guzol could only barely duck to evade it, and drew his sword and slashed the stalfos' spine in half. Then he retrieved the spear and stabbed the head a few more times for good measure.

"...That one was just sneaky." He said indignantly to Sayomi. "It's not like I had any trouble killing it. Anyway, looks like we're on an even score now~" He smiled. "This is gonna get exciting, isn't it? Although you can be sure of it I'll win and you'll be paying for dinner. I like fish, just so you know." He teasingly nudged her with his elbow before walking over to the door.

Guzol watched Sayomi with a raised eyebrow. Why did she seem to have such a problem with stairs? He suspected it was some sort of childhood trauma, seeing as she completely gave up at the sight of the stairs in front of them.

Then she pushed the statue over, and it hit a button, opening the door at the top of the stairs. It did seem like they had to go that way. ...Except Sayomi probably wasn't going to climb the stairs voluntarily.

"Alright big girl, looks like you're gonna have to climb this thing one way or another." Guzol looked Sayomi up and down, trying to guess how much she weighed. Then he shrugged, and without a word wrapped his arm around her waist and hoisted her on his shoulder.

"And we're gonna climb it my way! Let's go~!"

And up the stairs they went.

Guzol ignored Sayomi's tantrum while climbing the stairs, gradually feeling her calming down as they progressed in this hellish ascent. The stuffy air, combined with the desert heat present in this part of the temple and his, to be honest, quite heavy colleague was taking its toll on Guzol.

His heart sank a little when there was a second set of stairs behind the door, but he put on a brave smile and simply pressed on, even though he was starting to sweat a little now. He would certainly be feeling this in his muscles tomorrow.

"Alright, big girl, I think I can see the top now..." He huffed as they slowly made their way up, round and round on the stairs.

When Sayomi suddenly started screaming, he nearly dropped her out of surprise, but managed to grab her legs before she made a faceplant onto the hard stone steps, and hoisted her back onto his shoulder.

"I-I'm not grabbing your butt!" Guzol yelled, embarrassment creeping over him. "I was holding... well..." What had be been holding actually? He had initially grabbed her by the waist, but his hand might have gone a little lower during climbing, eventually ending on Sayomi's behind. But of course, he would never ever admit that.

"I can't help it you're covered in armour except for your arse! There was nothing else to hold on to! Would you rather I dropped you and you climb this thing yourself?"

As soon as they had reached the top of the staircase Sayomi sped away like a bat out of hell, as if she was somehow uncomfortable with Guzol carrying her. Guzol was about to comment on it, but stopped midsentence when he watched her try to climb the first catwalk.

“Oi, big girl! Watch it!” He ran after her, fearing his companion would somehow manage to fall down and meet a horrifying end by whatever hid in the abyss under the catwalks. Surprisingly enough, Sayomi managed to climb it in relative safety, or at least as safe as an accident disaster prone armour-clad woman could.

He kept his distance from his colleague, keeping a close eye on her in case she should fall over or in some wondrous manner manage to break down even more of the temple.

“So… Do we actually have any idea how we’re going to get out of here? Or where those minions actually are? It seems awfully quiet in here…”

No matter how many mission he would be sent on with Sayomi, Guzol would always be astonished by the woman’s destructiveness, whether willing or not.

He cringed when she almost got herself crushed, but thank the heavens the stone rolled over the sun insignia instead of his colleague. But what happened next was worse than everything they had encountered up to now.

The door at the other end of the room slowly creaked open, and a loud, rumbling sound came from the darkness within. Then, slowly, something came out of the door. Something covered in big shiny armor. Something carrying some pretty heavy and sharp-looking weapons. Something which was probably going to kick both their asses if they didn’t react now. Something which smashed Guzol straight in the wall because he didn’t react fast enough.

“Sayomi! Watch it! It’s a Darknut!”

Not that that hadn’t been clear from the second the creature had stepped out of the door.

Guzol was vaguely aware of being covered in tons of bruises and a bleeding gash on his stomach, right below his chest plate. But that was the last thing he was worried about right now. He had scrambled up to warn Sayomi only to see her get the full blow from the Darknut and flying across the room, blood spouting from her helmet.

“SAYOMI!”

Rage and horror welled up in him as his colleague dropped to the floor, lying there motionless. Guzol was torn between rushing over to check on her and dealing with the Darknut, until the latter came storming right at him, sword raised for a second attack.

“Shit. No, no… C’mon big girl, not you…” He heaved, scrambling up and grabbing onto his spear with shaking hands. His head was spinning from the hit but he had to hold on. If he gave up now they’d both be doomed for sure.

Guzol took a few shaky breaths, trying to focus himself on the Darknut. There was no way he could take him on like this, but if he could distract or stun it somehow…

Then he got an idea. He vaguely remembered hearing something about Darknuts having a weak spot on the back of their armors and helmets. Everything that happened next happened very quick. Right as the Darknut came storming at Guzol, he dashed forward, wedged the tip of his spear between the tiles and vaulted himself up, pulled the spear out and slammed it onto the ground, creating a shockwave large enough to make the Darknut stumble.

Without thinking twice he leapt behind the Darknut and jumped up again, focusing all his power onto his spear and stabbed it in the back of the Darknuts helm, impaling it.

The Darknut fell over, taking Guzol with it, who collapsed onto the ground, gasping for air.

“I-I’m sorry, big girl… I may need a moment to catch my breath…” He muttered, tears pricking in his eyes as he struggled to stay awake.

Something was disturbing the peaceful nothingness Guzol was experiencing. For a moment, he had felt absolutely nothing, no pain, no fatigue, even though he was absolutely sure he should be in considerable pain for some reason.

Then slowly, things started to come back to him. Something dripping on his head, a voice, a searing pain in his stomach. Someone was begging him to say something. He opened his mouth, but no sound came out. He coughed, wincing at the metallic taste of blood that came up. Finally, he managed to speak, though his voice sounded strange, raspy and not like him at all.

"That Darknut counts for two."

He laughed weakly at his own joke, before coughing up more blood.

"...That you, big girl? ...There's so many of you." He murmured, eyes blinking slowly in an effort to focus. No matter how much he enjoyed the sight of her, seeing his colleague three times was a little discomforting. He raised his hand, trying to touch her face.

"No tears... It's not like I'm- ...like I'm dying, right? I just- I just need a bit of... patching up. And perhaps a nap." He was growing weaker fast, with the wound on his stomach still bleeding, but he had to hold on, he wasn't going to leave Sayomi behind like this.

A surprised gasp was all that escaped from Guzol’s lips when Sayomi pulled him against her. He was glad for the sign of affection, but part of him also felt… odd. His face was heating up like a bonfire, and no doubt it was a bright red too. He was about to protest when she put him back down again, but then he realised he was still bleeding from the wounds he had sustained in the battle with the Darknut.

“I’d much rather have you take off my clothes in a different… context.” Guzol said with a nervous laugh, wincing as Sayomi patched him up. He was trying to put on a brave face, but it hurt like hell and he was still feeling odd from the hug before.

When his colleague was done bandaging him, he sat up, carefully, to not put too much strain on the wound.

“Sayomi, I… uh…” He stammered, at a loss for words. What exactly did he want to say? He wasn’t even sure himself.

“Thank you.” He said softly, putting a hand against her face.

"So... that's the end, huh? One more room and we'll be out of here."

Despite feeling horribly weak and limp, and despite needing his colleague's support to stand upright, he put on a grin. If he wasn't going to be able to help out in the fighting part, he could at least try to keep morale high. Even though the last few minutes between them were certainly making him feel awkward around Sayomi.

As they slowly made their way towards the door, Guzol looked at the dead Darknut. Now he had a good look at it, he realised how extraordinarily lucky he had been. He was lucky he had remembered that jumping strike technique, without it he would never have survived, seeing as even now he had only narrowly avoided being split in two. He made a mental note to start working on this new technique as soon as they got back to the barracks and he had recovered.

Right before the door they paused, and he pulled his spear from the Darknut's head. His grip was anything but steady and his entire arm was shaky, but it had to do. It was all he was capable of now.

He patted Sayomi's shoulder, putting on a brave smile.

"Let's get this over with, then we can go home. I'll treat you to dinner."

Guzol swallowed at the sight of the two witches. He nudged his colleague, trying to manage a smile.

"Think they're just gonna let us go? Perhaps if we ask nicely?"

He let out a strained laugh, followed by a raspy cough. They couldn't have been in a worse condition to fight. No matter how hard they tried to put up a brave face, they were both at their limits, perhaps even well past them. Guzol could only stand by leaning on his spear and Sayomi's shoulders, and she herself wasn't doing much better. If they wanted to beat the witches and live to tell the tale, they'd better come up with a damn good plan.

Seeing as the witches had not yet acknowledged their presence, Guzol dared to speak again.

"So, Say... Any plans? Or perhaps some last words?"