(Feel free to leave comments here. No need to PM me. Now, please. Tell me the 70 ways I did this wrong, and the 70 ways I can improve on it.) Name: Don'sha Race: Hylian Gender: Male Age: Don'sha is in his late twenties or early thirties Appearance: Don'sha can only be described by his enormous stature. He towers above most Hylians, and stands equal to smaller Gorons. His broad shoulders and upper body suggest heavy training since child hood. His face is very masculine with deep blue eyes and a fairly large chin. His face is unkempt, and usually has a small, scruffy blonde beard. Don'sha has a long bang that partially covers his left eye. The rest of his long blonde hair flows down to the top of his waist. When fighting, he usually ties up his hair into a pony tail. Don'sha's attire is simple. Most days its a simple blue and grey cotton dye tee and deer hide leggings. He has a very damaged chain mail suit that he wears over his blue and grey dyed shirt in situations where he knows he will need the extra protection Place of Residence: Castle Town, Goron Slums. PWC: 2/1/1 (Let me know If I'm doing this wrong, but I believe I get an additional 4 points because I'm a newb?) So that makes it, 5/2/2 Treasure and Rupees: Racial Perks: Hero's Legacy: a trait which makes it easier to acquire WeaponBase treasures Spin Attack: an offensive weapon-based technique used by a legendary hero Sense: a defensive trait that warns a Hylian of nearby enemies, as if by some supernaturals sense Treasure: Shield Breaker: P5 100-55= 45 Helm Splitter: P5 45-20= 15 Rupees Left, 15 Equipment: Don'sha doesn't have much when it comes to possessions. He has a small beat up slum with the Gorons. He has his tattered clothes and his beat up chain mail, but above all, he values his giant great sword. The great sword is a run of the mill guard great sword, but to Don'sha, it is his favorite possession. He has torn duffel bag where he stores his chain mail, a map and compass, some clothes and such. Personality: Don'sha's attitude could be considered gruff and blunt. He doesn't mind saying what he thinks, despite the consequences. One could even say he lacks discipline and manners. But underneath, away from people, Don'sha has a softer side the he's afraid to show, as he thinks it is a weakness. He will occasionally make some dark jokes, or plain stupid comments that only he finds amusing. His demeanor is easy going, and finds it hard to be serious at times. Underlying Don'sha's facade is deep trauma that he physically represses. Relying on alcohol and humor, Don'sha shys away from his deeper problems. He is touchy about his past and prefers not to talk about it. Don'sha once tried to join the Castle Guard when he was a teenager when he was living in the Goron slums. But the guard merely ridiculed and shamed young Don'sha, saying "We don't want no street rat, back to the gutter with you." Don'sha now despises the guard and doesn't think to fondly of the Hyrule monarchy either. When the 13 or so, he was taken into the care of one of the Gorons, and finds comfort in their banter and way of life in the slums. Don'sha's various hobbies include drinking, over sleeping, wresting with Gorons in the slums, and sword play. He also has a nasty habit of harassing the guard, but that hasn't hurt anybody... Too much, at at least. Background: Don'sha is tricky one. At the age of 13, Don'sha was involved with in accident that caused some memory loss. Everything before the accident was wiped clean, and all he knows is what the Gorons have told him. Don'sha was born in Ruto from a highly respected guard duo who eventually married and left the busy life of Castle town to the beautiful countryside of Ruto. He was taught the basics of sword combat, and a knights discipline. From what he was told, he was happy, but unforutnely the peace never lasted. When Ganons forces attacked South Hyrule, his family died protecting the village, and they entrusted a close family friend to take him across death mountain. In the escape he was attacked by a Moblin and suffered head trauma when the Moblin striked across the head. Eventually, the Gorons were forced out of their mountain, and he got moved into the slums with all the other Gorons. As he grew up, he played with the Goron children and developed his already strong upper body strength. At around age 17, Don'sha tried to join the Castle Guard to follow in the footsteps of his mother and father. The recruitment soldiers laughed at Don'sha and mocked his desire. After harassing him, they beat him up around new recruits to show them how to deal with 'gutter children.' Going back to the slums where he lived, one of the retired guard Gorons became Don'sha's mentor and trainer. Eventually after 7 or so years, Don'sha had become proficient in the great sword, and inherited his mentor's after he passed away. After his mentor passed away, Don'sha stayed in the slums and became a 'hired protection' of sorts. He mainly deals carrige rides across North Hyrule. He can be easily spotted by visiting various taverns and spotting the giant, blonde Hylian.
Hi there! Nice to see you've already posted your character. However, there are a few problems. You used five points instead of four. Goblins don't exist, but Bokoblins and Moblins do. I'd suggest changing it to one of those; like a Moblin, just for the extra oomph. You seem to be missing an 'a' there. Other than this, it looks good.
Hey Cloud thanks for letting me down easy. I had used a pretty sketch spell check that automatically corrected some words like "Moblin" to Goblin. I felt pretty stupid for proof reading the non auto corrected and not proof reading the finalized script. So my bad. I caught the mistake about 5 minutes after I posted and did a quick edit. Moblin shows up for me, but I'd be more than happy to fix my math and a few grammar issues and copy and paste on a new post Name: Don'sha Race: Hylian Gender: Male Age: Don'sha is in his late twenties or early thirties Appearance: Don'sha can only be described by his enormous stature. He towers above most Hylians, and stands equal to smaller Gorons. His broad shoulders and upper body suggest heavy training since child hood. His face is very masculine with deep blue eyes and a fairly large chin. His face is unkempt, and usually has a small, scruffy blonde beard. Don'sha has a long bang that partially covers his left eye. The rest of his long blonde hair flows down to the top of his waist. When fighting, he usually ties up his hair into a pony tail. Don'sha's attire is simple. Most days its a simple blue and grey cotton dye tee and deer hide leggings. He has a very damaged chain mail suit that he wears over his blue and grey dyed shirt in situations where he knows he will need the extra protection Place of Residence: Castle Town, Goron Slums. PWC: 5/1/2 Treasure and Rupees: Racial Perks: Hero's Legacy: a trait which makes it easier to acquire WeaponBase treasures Spin Attack: an offensive weapon-based technique used by a legendary hero Sense: a defensive trait that warns a Hylian of nearby enemies, as if by some supernaturals sense Treasure: Shield Breaker: P5 100-55= 45 Helm Splitter: P5 45-20= 15 Rupees Left, 15 Equipment: Don'sha doesn't have much when it comes to possessions. He has a small beat up slum with the Gorons. He has his tattered clothes and his beat up chain mail, but above all, he values his giant great sword. The great sword is a run of the mill guard great sword, but to Don'sha, it is his favorite possession. He has torn duffel bag where he stores his chain mail, a map and compass, some clothes and such. Personality: Don'sha's attitude could be considered gruff and blunt. He doesn't mind saying what he thinks, despite the consequences. One could even say he lacks discipline and manners. But underneath, away from people, Don'sha has a softer side the he's afraid to show, as he thinks it is a weakness. He will occasionally make some dark jokes, or plain stupid comments that only he finds amusing. His demeanor is easy going, and finds it hard to be serious at times. Underlying Don'sha's facade is deep trauma that he physically represses. Relying on alcohol and humor, Don'sha shys away from his deeper problems. He is touchy about his past and prefers not to talk about it. Don'sha once tried to join the Castle Guard when he was a teenager when he was living in the Goron slums. But the guard merely ridiculed and shamed young Don'sha, saying "We don't want no street rat, back to the gutter with you." Don'sha now despises the guard and doesn't think to fondly of the Hyrule monarchy either. When the 13 or so, he was taken into the care of one of the Gorons, and finds comfort in their banter and way of life in the slums. Don'sha's various hobbies include drinking, over sleeping, wresting with Gorons in the slums, and sword play. He also has a nasty habit of harassing the guard, but that hasn't hurt anybody... Too much, at at least. Background: Don'sha is tricky one. At the age of 13, Don'sha was involved with in accident that caused some memory loss. Everything before the accident was wiped clean, and all he knows is what the Gorons have told him. Don'sha was born in Ruto from a highly respected guard duo who eventually married and left the busy life of Castle town to the beautiful countryside of Ruto. He was taught the basics of sword combat, and a knights discipline. From what he was told, he was happy, but unforutnely the peace never lasted. When Ganons forces attacked South Hyrule, his family died protecting the village, and they entrusted a close family friend to take him across death mountain. In the escape he was attacked by a Moblin and suffered head trauma when the Moblin striked across the head. Eventually, the Gorons were forced out of their mountain, and he got moved into the slums with all the other Gorons. As he grew up, he played with the Goron children and developed his already strong upper body strength. At around age 17, Don'sha tried to join the Castle Guard to follow in the footsteps of his mother and father. The recruitment soldiers laughed at Don'sha and mocked his desire. After harassing him, they beat him up around new recruits to show them how to deal with 'gutter children.' Going back to the slums where he lived, one of the retired guard Gorons became Don'sha's mentor and trainer. Eventually after 7 or so years, Don'sha had become proficient in the great sword, and inherited his mentor's after he passed away. After his mentor passed away, Don'sha stayed in the slums and became a 'hired protection' of sorts. He mainly deals in carrige rides across North Hyrule. He can be easily spotted by visiting various taverns and spotting the giant, blonde Hylian.
