Prisonbank

​

You find yourself in a bank.

As far as you can see, there is no EXIT.

What will you do?​

Do I have a gun? If I do, I should rob the bank. A ski mask would probably help too.

I'll throw money around like confetti and probably softly weep to myself

• Look around for a teller.​

You approach the TELLER WINDOW. You immediately notice the poorly drawn window is not a cookie. A fact that will stop you from attempting to grab it.

A robotic VOICE resounds from the other side, as if automatically. You are asked to state your BUSINESS.​

• Check your pockets.
• Check for a ski mask, a gun, and a to-do list.
• Throw money around like confetti and probably softly weep to yourself.

You are asked again, to state your NAME, PINN, and BUSINESS.

However, you're frantically going through your POCKETS.
(The POCKETS are your current inventory system. They contain everything you have collected as well as your original possessions.)

You manage to scrounge up your possessions.
You currently POSSESS:
(1) WALLET (sub-inventory)
(1) TO-DO LIST
(1) ORDINARY KEY

The WALLET contains:
About 300 FUNBUX
(1) IDENTIFICATION CARD or "ID"
(2) *BUX GIFT CARD(s)
(1) OBAMACARE INSURANCE CARD
(1) UNICEF TRIBUTE RECEPTACLE
(13) NUMBER PIN(s)
(1) PROTECTION (consumable)

Upon ignoring the VOICE, you promptly MAKE IT RAIN.
You're filled with melancholy and frivolity all of a sudden as you begin to WEEP.
Your hand grasps the KEY tightly, making sure it is never misplaced.
A camera jolts to an angle, pointing itself directly at you. You are under suspicion.

Code:

-You have gained 5 exp for your performance
-You have dropped 50 FUNBUX to the floor
-You have unlocked the actions MAKE IT RAIN, WEEP, and CRAFT PIN NUMBER
-You have unlocked access to your ID, and all the information it "contains"
-You have unlocked the procedure PAY TRIBUTE
-You have unlocked the location TELLER WINDOW
-most importantly, you have unlocked the ability to READ and UPDATE your TO-DO LIST

#Notes: Blue denotes and entity, lime denotes a location, orange denotes a special action, red denotes a mundane item or basic noun (such as a word or number), purple denotes a bound or "key" item.

(You should probably give your name, ID, business, and PINN to the Teller.)​

> Weep.

• Weep.

You cannot weep any harder.​

I state my name, which is Alfredo.

>> State your PINN to be 144268943. Your business is that you wish to . . . WITHDRAW FUNDS, with which to buy various . . . endowments of the mythological creature variety.

After the number of verses in some kind of super long anthem to something.

• State your PINN to be 144268943

You can't do this, as you only have enough NUMBER PINS to make a small portion of the digits. You run out at 2, which becomes a 7.
Using CRAFT PIN NUMBER, you assemble the pins into 1447.​

• My name is Alfredo Jenkins, my PINN is 1447, and I want to-

You take a look at that ID, which tells you everything but the PINN you crafted which you wrote in with the bank pencil.
Wait a minute. . . COG: Wiped? Your memory was wiped? that explains why you can't remember why you're here.
DETAINED? But this is a BANK. A bank, you mean. You were just describing it, not stating your immediate location.
It seems you are a prisoner in this place that resembles a bank. It also seems you have a penchant for being ravished by giant reptiles.​

•Withdraw funds to buy endowments of the mythological creature variety.

The AUTOMATIC TELLER MACHINE buzzes loudly.
The device states that, while you wish to buy a fairy tale creature's replicated genitals, you are not required to elaborate on what the money is for.
You insert your ID into the slot.
It makes a loud buzzing as it processes your request.

You should probably figure out what the fuck is going on.

Code:

-You have received 200 FUNBUX
-You may no longer CRAFT PIN NUMBER
-You have recognized the entity ATM
-You have gained the status AMNESIAC

Also you're free to write this song whenever, especially now that you have the required lyrical information. You will earn bonus experience for performing it for the cameras.

I roll in the money, since I'm locked up in a bank I'm clearly money too. Though I am slightly terrified by my desire for certain mythological limbs.